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Never Grow Up
No one wants to grow up. As part of our current 'making the children more responsible' campaign I now get chores (oh joy... I never had to do any work before, just hours of music practice and room tidying), and today I had to do some vacuuming. Me and the vacuum have a long standing feud, I can't believe no one has invented a silent vacuum cleaner yet... Anyway, I well and truly showed it who was boss today.
You may have noticed that I say vacuuming instead of hoovering... It's my grandad's fault. I also find it hard to say 'You have two choices' (you have two OPTIONS but only one choice). I'm not that bad though, compared to him, I once heard him say 'Methyl-2-cyanoacrylate' instead of superglue (it wasn't actual branded superglue). But it is my mission to slip that word into conversation. I already memorise the spelling of chemical compounds so I can ruin people's jokes:
Foolish innocent bystander: 'What does DNA stand for?'
Ruth: 'Deoxyribonucleic acid, but I think the punchline you're looking for is national Dyslexic Association.'
You can tell how loved I am by my peers...