P

Piano Man
My dad copied this song onto my computer from vinyl (I know, I still have records in my house) and I think it is pretty awesome, and unfortunately I am pretty sure that it in some way includes a prophecy for the rest of my life: either I end up playing in a piano bar, or get pissed on my own. It has some amazing literary techniques in though. Oh, the 90s had some pretty splendid music though. And less terrorism. Did you see Norway on the news? It was awful, and very unexpected. Who could even imagine a terrorist attack on NORWAY?!?! (I'll be honest I didn't hear enough of it to know if it was supposed to be terrorist, but that is certainly what it looked like. It looked a lot like the devastation after the tsunami in japan, but I suspect as only a small part of the country was hit, it isn't actually too bad.
Anyway, drifting back to whatever point I intended to make, someone asked me what they would call our time period when they looked back at history, would we be the Elizabethans, the Windsors or what? But I think we will probably be the 20th and 21st century, because history is too global and anti-monarchist at the moment for that. I suppose we might end up being 'Ombamians' though. Which would be pretty damn cool. It seems to me that no one in America even likes Obama anymore, but the British are still pretty obsessed by him. My English teacher has his victory speech on her iPod. But she is rather strange in the first place. Anyway, dragging this monologue gracefully round to the point, when people look back at our lives they're going to remember the Middle East, global warming, 9/11, the internet and Lady Gaga. No one is going to give a crap about art council funds, or Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, or chlamydia, or blu-ray. I'm pretty sure. So if you are reading this several hundred years in the future, art councils are basically giving people money to stick toilets to walls (it's installation art, apparently, shows what crap the basis of our lives are built on),Charlie and the Chocolate factory was a book written by a children's author called 'Roald Dahl' who wrote various other popular and funny kids books, it has been made into two films, one starring Gerard Butler, and various other people, and a remake which I think is called 'Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory' (apparently 'Charlie' is offensive because it is American street slang for a black man. I lose faith in humanity and sanity) which stars Johnny Depp (phwoar) and various other people (Freddie Highmore, Helena Bonham-Carter, Christopher Lee, can't remember who else). Anyway, it teaches chilren to follow their dreams, and not be greedy. It also has lots of little orange people, with green hair. They were the much cooler pre-runners to chavs (Chavs are basically the same, but they have dropped the merry improvised singing, which in unfortunate). Chlamydia is a sexually transmitted infection which is pretty much symptomless in early stages, but it can cause infertility in women. Apparently 1 in 10 people between the ages of 13 and 25 have it, but in my area of the country that goe sup to 1 in 4. That means statistically speaking, 7 people in my class have it. I have spent a few hilarious minutes trying to guess which ones. Blu-ray is a new type of DVD that is slightly better quality and several times more expensive. I really don't think it's going to catch on, which is a shame, as the name is more catchy, even if it is less relevant than 'DVD' (if history goes really badly you may not know, so 'DVD' stands for "digital video disk". Please don't make me explain what video means.). So that was a fairly reminiscent blog post, submitted by telepathy (now I'm just fucking with the people from the future). Toodles.